A friend had a birthday party and on the invitation she put,
No gifts, please. But if you don't feel right coming to a birthday party without a gift, contact So-and-So to contribute to a gift certificate to my FAVORITE spa (it's all I want for my birthday!). But really no gift is necessary.
She did this in order to prevent people from giving her things she doesn't want or need, like candles and gift soaps, etc.
Some contributed to the spa certificate and some did not and that was fine. But some people came to the party with gifts they had bought. One brought cologne, another brought an expensive candle, another a bath gift basket. In other words, they brought exactly what my friend didn't want.
Am I wrong to consider those that brought the gifts inconsiderate since they didn't follow her wishes? Why would someone try to go shopping for something the birthday person will like when she's told them point blank that there's only thing she wants? Did the gift-buying people not read the request or did they think contributing to a gift certificate was too impersonal and thoughtless? I think getting a gift other than the only thing the person wants is thoughtless.