Sunday, March 31, 2013

It Is Lifted!

Easter Sunday usually depresses me, but last year, for the first time in my life, it didn't. Why? Our dog Ozzie seemed to make the difference. Between doing some volunteer work and taking care of our new dog, I made it to the end of Easter 2012 with no feelings of dread or sadness. At the end of the evening I was startled to tell the dog that it was the first Easter I could remember, all the way back to childhood, that hadn't made me feel bad.

So this year I didn't scramble to find an activity to keep me occupied on Easter Sunday or try to find a way to distract myself. In fact, I so completely didn't dread Easter 2013 that I made no plans at all. As the day got closer and closer, the old fear didn't kick in and right now I'm enjoying Easter as just another Sunday afternoon. It feels so good to have the curse taken off this holiday!

The lifting of my dislike of Easter also shocks me because I didn't even focus on it. I've spent decades emotionally healing many fears and fixations, but my problem with Easter was not one of them. Maybe I don't always have to work very hard on every single problem and neurosis. I tend to work very hard on my personal problems and it's paid off, but I'm very happy to find that some things can heal on their own, while my attention is on other issues. That must be what happened here because I can tell that even if I didn't have the company of the dog, I'd be okay on Easter. Easter is no longer scary to me.

So while others today are rejoicing "He Is Risen!" I'm rejoicing "It Is Lifted!" Hallelujah!

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